sorta wanna die sorta wanna kiss you sorta wanna get my shit together sorta wanna lose twenty pounds in a month??
I have relapsed.
& I’m so incredibly sorry.
I know soon it will become apparent. My mom will call be everyday when I get off work to ask how I’m feeling & beg me to come over so she can make me dinner.
My sister will tell everyone that I starve myself. She always knows.
My boyfriend will be happy with the progress, but hate me for not talking about it. It’s never really good enough.
I’ll try really hard to pretend that I’m healthy. But everyone always knows. I don’t know if it’s the dark circles under my eyes, or the constant excuse of why I can’t eat that day.
I’m really sorry.
Every day I struggle between “I wanna look good naked” and “treat yo self.”